Many of us seek happiness, but let's acknowledge a truth: happiness can often feel elusive. Happiness isn't a final destination—it's a fleeting emotion. You get something you wanted, and you feel happy. You avoid something you didn't want, and you feel happy. It's a roller coaster responding to life's circumstances.
Joy, on the other hand, is a beautiful, almost peaceful, consistent, and positive state of being that endures. It's a joy you can rest in and count on. Living daily in this state of joy-filled well-being is what I call a Joyful Life. It emerges from discipline, wisdom, focus, love, and inner strength. It's a journey of continuous progress, not a state of flawless perfection.
Most importantly, the power to live joyfully resides within you right now.
While everyone desires joy, let's examine what's truly involved in living a joy-filled life.
I think of joy as a seed that exists within each of us already. You were born with it, and it remains there even if you haven't felt it in a while—even if you've never felt it at all. Over the years, life's events and challenges have caused you to pile hurts, pains, and traumas on top of this seed. All this seed needs is nourishment and care to bloom. Just as you would nurture a plant, a pet, or a child, you need to nurture this seed of joy. Let's explore how to do that.
Good Soil: You are the good soil. The hard work involves removing the emotional debris that you've buried on top of this seed of joy. This takes time, but each time you feel the opposite of joy—whatever that emotion may be—take a minute to be present and ask yourself: What is this about? Why did this emotion surface?
Don't look toward blaming others. If you want to give that seed a clear path, you need to do the work, and the first step is taking responsibility and looking in the mirror. It's always you who needs to take action because it's your seed of joy that isn't growing. We can't wait for someone else to cultivate our joy, can we?
Communication: Yes, I talk to my plants. I tell my plants, pets, and children that they are loved, that they are brave, that they can accomplish anything they set their minds to. Positive self-talk is a powerful first step. Let's cease being so critical of ourselves and others. You've heard me say, "You are what you think," and it's true—so keep it positive. Speak to yourself with encouraging, supportive words and extend that same kindness to others. Notice when negative thoughts arise and redirect them immediately.
Food: You wouldn't feed your plant, pet, or child junk food, so don't consume it yourself in any form! Eat whole foods. Stop eating things you know harm your body. We're surrounded by poor food choices, and the boundaries often blur, but ask yourself: Would I feed this to a child? If the answer is no, then don't eat it.
This principle applies equally to what you feed your mind. Don't consume mental junk food: toxic television, angry political shows, endless social media scrolling, violent entertainment, or pornography. What are you putting into your mind and body? Is it nourishing your seed of joy?
Water: What are you quenching your thirst with? Are you living in alignment with your innermost desires and passions? I recently left a job that provided no joy whatsoever—in fact, it was draining my joy. Don't deny your true thirst for life. What activity energizes and excites you most? What can you do for hours that feels like minutes? Drink deeply from that well!
Sunlight: To me, sunlight represents God—the warmth and love of the divine. This is the most important relationship you can possibly cultivate. Spend time alone with God in meditation every day. God is light, and you need this light for your seed to grow. Sunlight symbolizes love: the relationships with close family and friends, the love that fills your soul. This needs to be replenished by both spending time with those who matter most to you and with God.
All these elements, applied consistently over time, will allow your joy to grow. The key is discipline and persistence. Eventually, you'll realize you're full of joy—not just containing it but overflowing with it to the point where you naturally spread it to others.
Someone recently said to me, "You're always happy," and it struck me: I suppose I am. I don't feel intensely happy every moment, but I do experience a consistent joy living inside me. I know it's growing stronger each day. Let's embark on this journey toward joy-filled lives together so we can spread joy in ways our world desperately needs right now. If not now, when?
Remember: stay aware and stay rooted in joy.
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